✒The prospect of BBC Radio 1 breakfast DJ Chris Moyles ever overtaking his Radio 2 rival Chris Evans appears to have long since disappeared over the horizon. Moyles thought he might have the nation's most popular breakfast show when Sir Terry Wogan retired, but it was not to be. But wait – there's more. Not only does Moyles have Radio 4's Today programme breathing down his neck – just 90,000 listeners behind according to the latest Rajar figures last week – he is also trailing Radio 2's Ken Bruce, who has 7.45 million listeners, making him the second biggest radio show in the country, to Moyles's 7.24 million. The pop master is dead. Long live the Popmaster.
✒Did Doctor Who feature prominently in last week's Broadcast Awards? Monkey only asks after last week's issue of the telly trade mag reported on a "glittering ceremony at Grosvenor House" with more than 1,200 guests and "presided over by comedian Tim Vine and Stephen Mangan". Let's hope they both made it. Broadcast mag arrived with subscribers on Thursday morning. The Broadcast Awards? Took place on Thursday night.
✒BBC Radio 5 Live presenter Richard Bacon had his own take on the BBC Trust review of the station, published last week, which suggested it might like to cut back on the inconsequential chit chat and pay more attention to minority sports not covered elsewhere on the wireless. Over to RB: "My show today is exclusively lacrosse, British bulldog, fives and Kabaddi," he told listeners. "Non-stop coverage for the next two hours of British bulldog." Disappointingly for Kabaddi fans, the show actually featured Alain de Botton talking about his new book – which will have pleased the trust – and Strictly Come Dancing judge Len Goodman on who should replace Alesha Dixon on Strictly Come Dancing, which may or may not.
✒BBC Radio 4's Afternoon Play is about to be no more. Fear not, it's not being axed – like some of those short stories – it's just being given a change of name. From 18 February it will henceforth be known as the Afternoon Drama. The Friday Play will become the Friday Drama, the Saturday Play the Saturday Drama (there is a pattern developing here) and the Woman's Hour drama becomes, er … 15 Minute Drama. "We don't really make plays, we make drama," explained Radio 4 drama commissioning editor Jeremy Howe. "Don't get me wrong – I love the theatre – I used be a theatre director – but that's not what we do, and I am not sure that is how you see what we do." Seeing a radio play … sorry, drama? Now that is revolutionary.
✒It's all change for Ian Jones, the Welsh-born new chief executive at S4C, who has traded in New York and his high-flying job at the History Channel for Cardiff. But at least he knew what he was letting himself in for. Not so his partner, Australian TV executive Andrea Ulbrick, who has never been to rain-swept Wales. "The sun's come out, oh no, it's car headlights," she quipped in one of her tweets. And a wary welcome in the hillsides is unlikely to be improved by her first reaction to S4C fare such as Pobol y Cwm (viewed with the help of English subtitles); it's clearly well-intentioned, but saying you're "pleasantly surprised at the quality" can't help but sound a teensy bit patronising.
✒With so many inquiries asking editors and other senior journalists to do a turn – besides Leveson, the Commons culture select committee is looking into phone hacking, and its home affairs counterpart begins to excitingly explore the Chandlerian world of private detectives tomorrow – they have adjusted to taking the accompanying surreal experiences in their stride. There was a forgivable hint of surprise, however, when the Sun's editor, Dominic Mohan, showed up in Westminster last week to face yet another panel of worthies (the joint committee on privacy and injunctions) and found them chaired, Spanish inquisition-style, by … the Lord Bishop of Chester. Multitasking chairman John Whittingdale was off sick, his deputy was off too, so the bish was obliged to plunge mentally into a red-top hell he presumably has little contact with, unless, of course, he regularly goes clubbing with the Hollyoaks cast.
✒Monkey is prepared to wager his coveted heritage typewriter that the next Katie Price was crowned last week. Tulisa Contostavlos signed a three-book deal with Headline on Friday, with a mix of autobiography (to appear this autumn, synchronised with the next X Factor series) and fiction that matches Price's bestselling formula, which has so far produced four memoirs and seven ghosted novels. Six other publishers apparently fought Headline for Contostavlos's signature, and the battle to make a Price-style fly-on-the-wall TV series with her could well be equally intense, with networks appealing to her loyalty. Will it be Channel 4, which put her on screen in Being… N-Dubz in 2010, long before the call from Simon Cowell? BBC3, which separated her from the band and showed she spoke well on camera in the same year's Tulisa – My Mum and Me? Or ITV2, which aired Price's early series and would surely want the Little Mix mentor to stick with the ITV family?
✒So far, the announced candidates for BBC director general, once the Olympic flame is quenched and Thommo steps down, are the columnists Quentin Letts and Anne McElvoy. The Daily Mail's Letts would turn the Beeb's clock back to the late 60s and early 70s of his own boyhood, abolishing Radio 1, daytime and night-time TV and BBC3, restoring cricket and Play for Today, and implicitly seeking to push the average audience age up to around 65. The London Evening Standard's McElvoy seems to look more modestly to 1982, when feminist complaints about TV sexism resulted in newborn Channel 4's line-up of female commissioning editors and on-screen faces. Still awaited are applications from Letts's colleagues Simon Heffer and Melanie Phillips, who both believe the country went to the dogs in the 60s, but how far will they dare to time-travel backwards – before the Beatles? Before newsreaders ditched their dinner-jackets? Before television?