✒TV's second-worst job, after being one of ESPN's freezing, al fresco sports pundits, must be looking after Daybreak's Twitter feed, presumably a naughty-step assignment. Last week's tweets suggest it entails repeatedly replying to viewers convinced the wrong time is showing (note barely the contained fury): "For the people still insisting our clock is wrong, Daybreak is now finished and Lorraine is airing. If watching Daybreak you're on [ITV]+1." And when the queries aren't clock-related? They're usually about where the presenters shop but there's still a hint at petulance: "It's not the same dress. Nadia's dress was from Kaliko. Kate's dress today is from Pied a Terre at House of Fraser."
✒Digital TV channel Alibi had a prescient new series last week, watched by 244,000 viewers. Alas Murdoch Mysteries was based on Maureen Jennings' 19th-century crime novels, not a 21st-century media empire.
✒TalkSport may sound like an unlikely topic for an eight-page feature in men's magazine Arena. The flattering profile – "How TalkSport took on the BBC and won" – is slightly spoilt by a picture of the station's green room which appears to feature porn playing on a widescreen TV.
✒ ITV News types could be forgiven for looking a little strained last week after their servers suffered a meltdown only marginally short of apocalyptic. A system which is usually able to store hundreds of hours of video could handle only five hours a day, according to insiders, barely longer than the ITN-produced programme is on air. Viewers' enjoyment remained unaffected, we are reassured.
✒Much excitement at the prospect of ITV1's new department store-based drama series, Mr Selfridge. Almost as excited as we are about BBC1's, er … new department store-based drama series, The Ladies' Paradise, details of which were first revealed last July. Like Upstairs Downstairs and Downton Abbey, these things have a habit of coming in pairs. But which reach the small screen first?*
✒ Last week's Twitter 100, the Independent's annual rankings, yielded places for the Guardian's Ben Goldacre (33), Jonathan Freedland (49), Andrew Sparrow (54), Charles Arthur (56), George Monbiot (67) and Alan Rusbridger (77) – though not, puzzlingly, for Patrick Butler and Jack Schofield, who shared with Miranda Hart the bizarre distinction of making the 100's Sgt Pepper-style cover in photo form without actually appearing in the league table. This was by no means the only mystery in a chart – based in part on "an algorithm called 'eigenvector centrality'" – whose politics top 10 was led by Paul Waugh (24,000 followers) but left out Nick Robinson (60,000) and Guido Fawkes (65,000). Still, at least the rankings lived up to the paper's name by including only one Indy contributor.
✒To the press screening of Julian Fellowes's £11m mini-series Titanic, held by ITV in an untested venue with an inadequately soundproofed roof, a too small screen, unraked seating reducing visibility, and incessant drilling noise. Had it taken place at Downton Abbey, some hacks suggested, Carson would have been given his marching orders by Lord Grantham.
✒Eagle-eyed viewers of Tom Bradby's new ITV1 show The Agenda on Monday night spotted one particularly interested audience member, namely ITN's chief executive, John Hardie. The Agenda is, of course, made by ITN. In his review of the show, Monkey's esteemed colleague Mark Lawson wondered why the audience was so silent. Perhaps that explains it.